Yesterday was the one year anniversary of my brother-in-law Randy’s death. It was not an easy day, anniversaries of this nature are always emotional. But it was not a horrible day, either. Dale and I both posted on Facebook and received a great deal of love and support from our friends there. There were phone calls with family members that included lots of reminiscing and sharing stories. There was a general feeling that Randy was among us all day long and I found that reassuring and comforting.
Grief is work, friends. It’s exhausting and at times it’s overwhelming. It’s also necessary. As I’ve learned (sometimes the hard way) pain, much like truth, will out. You can ignore it or stuff it back down. You can eat too much or drink too much. You can take your pain and use it to lash out at others. Or . . . you can acknowledge it, take the time you need to feel it, and release it. Sure, it will come back. But when it does you will be ready and you’ll go through the process of accepting and releasing your feelings. Again and again and again.
To quote my own social media post, grief is the price we pay for loving deeply. It’s heartbreaking and terrible. It’s also a blessing and an honor.
Anniversaries are hard, and so are the regular days between them. I’m glad your family and friends can share stories, love, and remembrances of Randy.
I’ve been thinking of you and Dale all week. Sending much love, my friend. XO
Beautifully put Carole. Thank-you xo
This is a very powerful post Carole, and beautiful written. Thank you for that. Love has many parts.
What a wise and beautiful post, Carole. Knowing this is the difference between a sad and bitter life and a rich and beautiful one. Thank you for sharing this. Have a good Monday.
Beautifully stated, Carole.
What a lovely tribute, Carole. Thank you for sharing!
Anniversaries are important to the process. Thank you for reminding me today. Sending good thoughts your way as you enter this holiday season with this grief.
Beautifully stated, and very very true. Holding space in my heart for all of you. The entire community misses Randy, but none so deeply as his beloved family.
Anniversaries can be so difficult. Wishing your family peace.
Anniversaries are hard. Thinking of you and your family.
Exhausting, overwhelming and sometimes seems to never ending. . .