I’ve been reflecting back on the year, the things that have gone well and the things that . . . well . . . haven’t gone so well. I’ve mostly had positive growth with my mental health and self improvement and want to share 3 things that have really been great for that.
- Talk therapy. January will mark 3 years since I started working with my current therapist. The catalyst was Randy’s death, but therapy is something I have done off and on since I was in college. I will say that this is the longest I have ever worked with one therapist and I’m truly seeing the benefit of a long term commitment to this work. All of the getting-to-know-you stuff is out of the way and we can quickly drill down to the root causes of so many of the things that try to trip me up. I’m incredibly grateful for this relationship and the myriad ways it has improved my life.
- Intuitive Eating & Body Image Coaching. I started working on this back in June and it’s been another life changing thing for me. I am D-O-N-E with diets and diet culture and the false promises of that industry. It robbed me of time and money and did some pretty significant damage to how I eat and what I think about how I look. It’s taken a lot of effort, and I’m not done yet, but I’ve learned that food is morally neutral; I’m not good if I eat a salad and bad if I eat ice cream. I’ve also learned that I don’t have to earn my food by exercising. That’s not to say that exercise or movement isn’t important, because I know it is. Rather, it’s to say that exercise is not punishment for the food I eat. And I don’t have to exercise to burn off the calories I take in.
- Style School. This is not something I ever saw myself doing or even needing but I’m so glad Kym suggested it and I took the leap. While I can’t always say that I love the way I look in clothes, I can say that I put a lot more effort into the clothes I choose each day. I am always seeking congruency, to have my outward appearance reflect my inner feelings. That photo I included in yesterday’s post? It was one of the first times I actually hit gold (as in, I looked as good as I felt) and I think you can see pretty clearly how chuffed I was with that outfit. This, much like therapy and intuitive eating and body acceptance, is the work of a lifetime and I am here for it.
All of those things built on each other. I never would have been ready for Style School if I hadn’t done the intuitive eating and body image work. And I never would have been ready for those things if I hadn’t committed to therapy. I am continuously growing and changing and learning about who I am and my place in the world and I wouldn’t have it any other way.
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I’m so glad to hear that all the hard work you’ve been doing is playing off for you. I think therapy is a great thing, even more so when you find a good therapist you can work with long term And bravo to you for getting into a better relationship with food, body image, and exercise. I am a firm believer in eating and exercising to be healthy and make yourself feel good, not because society tells you to look or eat a certain way.
Good for you! I’m still kind of stuck in the “don’t eat cookies because then you are bad” place and not sure how to get out of that. I know I shouldn’t eat anything to excess, and then there is the whole “I look terrible in my clothes and nothing feels good”. Keep up the good work!
What a great post! Love this reflection of your year. Your hard work is paying off. And you look so comfortable being you in that fantastic photo from yesterday!
Yesterday’s photo was fabulous!
GO YOU! I know that work is hard – and I appreciate your vulnerability in sharing it with us! – and it’s sure paying off! yesterday’s photo was awesome and I’m delighted you loved it, too!
I’m so glad that your hard work is paying off and I wish you the best as you move forward.
Your photo yesterday is fantastic!
Well, you already know I loved yesterday’s photo! But so happy all your hard work is paying off Carole and so thankful you are sharing witih us. That’s a big and difficult step, but you are doing it gracefully. Keep up your great work!
Go Carole Go. This is a fabulous post and one that would not be if it wasn’t for your hard work. And you absolutely shine in that picture from yesterday!
Yay for all of this, Carole! It is all impossibly hard work to do… and you are doing it so well!
P.S. I think you are so beautiful outside and inside! And you are just so inspiring! XO
I see a lot of practice in this post – your olw has really been showing up!
I’m just so proud of you, Carole. In ALL the ways. I’m so happy that the “inside you” is starting to match the “outside you” — y’know . . . that “outside you” we’ve all come to love and treasure. XOXOXO