You know what term gets thrown around a lot? Self care. It seems like I hear it all the time lately and I’m glad because it’s important to take care of yourself. Certainly no one else will do that one for you. I’ve been thinking about how I can demonstrate self care. I don’t want it to be about manicures or massages, I don’t want it to involve shopping or lunch with a friend, and I don’t want to count reading or knitting since those are things I do all the time anyway.
I want self care to be about . . . self improvement. I want it to be about thoughts and feelings and growth. I’ve grouped my ideas into actions and I’ve come up with . . . wait for it . . . three verbs to remind me of my goals and help me with my progress.
I vow to do more . . .
Listening. I will listen to myself and trust myself to do something that feels right and, by the same token, to not do something that feels off. I will listen to the people I love, Dale and the kids and Jackie (his little voice is so cute right now and he actually says Nana and Grandpa now). I will listen to my colleagues at work and on the Board of Selectmen. I will listen to people I agree with and people I don’t agree with, I will listen to people who have vastly different life experiences from me and I will use listening to improve my understanding.
Writing. I will write my story in a way that is authentic. I will write about things that have been difficult and things that have brought me joy. I will write to understand and reflect because writing helps me to process my feelings. I will write for you here on the blog and I will write privately in my journal. I will write long paragraphs and lists and quotes and nonsense. I will write to increase my creativity and I will write because all kinds of ideas are born and feelings are resolved when I put words on paper.
Pausing. I will pause to consider my options. I will pause to give myself time to think before I respond. I will pause to be still and be present. I will pause for gratitude and contemplation. I will pause and concentrate on breathing. I will pause to allow myself to rest, to think about possibilities and options, to make room for ideas and new concepts. I will pause to give myself time to consciously respond and by doing so I will access my intuition and increase my wisdom.
I’ve got to admit this post is pretty out there with the woo woo stuff. But guess what? That makes me love it all the more!
If you wrote a post for today (and I hope you did!) please include your link below.
This isn’t woo woo at all — this is very serious, contemplative stuff, and I think it’s great!
Listening is the hardest thing… especially listening to those we don’t agree with. This is a great list, Carole!
I agree with Sarah; this is the opposite of woo woo. I’ll be thinking about this all day, and hopefully practicing listening and pausing. Thank you!
These were all things from my parents’ generation and have become lost with instant gratification and modern convenience. Our tolerance for things that don’t occur quickly is gone. Everything condensed to 140 characters or 30 seconds in the microwave.
I should add that I completely agree with your post! I love all those things and that you are working on them.
What a lovely post. What really speaker to me is listening-pausing. Such respectful and honoring actions. I want to read and write more posts like this.
Wonderful, my friend. All great goals…I admire them.
A beautiful post and great advise for everyone.
I don’t see this as woo-woo at all! This is EXACTLY what I think of as self-care. The other stuff is pampering, or just part of a full life, but your list is all about being a better person and caring about yourself and others.
You wear your “woo-woo” well, Carole! I love this post, and I love your take on self care. Too often, I think self care does get swept up in the manicure-massage-shopping kinds of activities. Sure, those are great treats to give yourself now and then, but the REAL self care is taking care of yourSELF for the long haul. XOXO
Susan J Silva says
Love this, my self care goal is all about refilling so I can pour back out. Self Care that is only for the purpose of “self” is basically the true sense of the word “selfish” Self Care should always be about being full so we can give more of our self.
Jeannie Gray says
Great list of self care ideas. I agree 100% with your first paragraph. For me, those types of self care tend to be detrimental to my health and …’life plan’ for a want of a better term. I spend money I was planning to save; I eat too much desert and blow the diet & feel like crud for the next 2 days, I break a newly manicured nail in the car on the way home (this happens to me every single time!) and get angry….. Those types of things may be fun in the moment but are almost always regretted later.
Lovely post! Beautiful and heartfelt
Not woo-woo, but becoming a better human being
This was definitely not “woo-woo”. Could it mean we need more of this?
I would never have considered this “woo woo” at all.
As most of others said, not woo-woo. I, too, have been trying to do these things over the last few years. It is difficult to change habits, but it is so worthwhile not to quickly respond to people, dismiss people who don’t agree with you, or engage in order to learn from others when it is against your basic instincts. I have tried to do this quite a bit since he who shall not be named was elected, and I have struggled so much with it. But I think it is worthwhile. It is an exceeding rare occurrence when we can’t learn something from others that have a different life view. So I applaud you on your choices, and wish you well on your journey. You will become wiser, more empathetic, more thoughtful. I need to work on journaling; I just don’t find time for it.
I’ve been trying to pause before I react. Not easy 🙁
Love this read!!
Lisa Kachavos Cummings says
Carole, I “listened” to my husband when he said have that lump checked out in your breast even though it is painful (so not cancerous?) and even though your mammogram was ok 9 months ago. I listened to him and my gut bad feelings. I am alive today because of it. I live my life differently now in do many ways.
These are great and listening is so important right now. I’ve started writing at the beginning and end of the day. Sometimes it’s about what’s going on in the world around me, and sometimes it’s just what comes to mind. I like the idea of having something I’ve recorded so that when I’m older I can look back on what was going on during this time of my life.