Three On Thursday

First of all, here’s the headshot.

I don’t love it, but I don’t hate it either. I think for a free 2 minute experience in a conference setting it’s pretty decent. I think it says, this is a capable leader. But it’s also a little lifeless. I want a headshot where I look like I’m ready to have a conversation with you, where I’m leaning in and engaged and curious. I might have to pay a professional to get that sort of shot.

Okay, onward.

Here are three things I’ve learned about imposter syndrome since attending last week’s MMA Conference

  1. We all have it. Tami Pyfer, who has an incredibly impressive resume including things like being Education Policy Advisor to the governor in Utah and being one of USA Today’s Top Women of 2025, opened her remarks at lunch saying that every time she hears herself introduced she questions why she is there. She looked out at us and said, “imposter syndrome, who else has it?” And I think every woman in that room felt seen.
  2. Dale commented more than once on how much more outgoing I’ve become. At the Saturday morning keynote I went up and said hello to a few fellow MSA (Massachusetts Select Board Association) members before we sat down. And at the closing reception on Saturday afternoon, as we were getting ready to leave, I asked him to hold up for a minute while I made a point of saying goodbye to a few people. Dale said I never would have done that a few years ago, that I would have just sat down without saying hello and that I would have just left without saying goodbye. Interesting.
  3. Action is the antidote to imposter syndrome. Once you act, the inner critic in your head (I call mine Gladys) loses the narrative. Confidence doesn’t precede action, it follows it. Every hello, every head nod, every question and follow up, builds on the previous one and eventually you realize that imposter syndrome fades when you stop auditioning and start participating. Clearly, it doesn’t go away entirely (hello, Tami Pyfer) but action creates receipts and imposter syndrome has a hard time being loud when you bring receipts.

I’d love to hear your experiences with imposter syndrome and what you do to act in spite of it.

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Comments (7)

  1. Yay, Carole! You’ve clearly made an effort to get to know people at some events you’ve attended. The first, often hardest step, in developing relationships. Feeling those connections has enabled you to hush Gladys when she suggests they won’t remember you. I’m also guessing these are folks who made you feel like you added to their experience which is a good way to share our receipts. Psssst, you deserve a professional headshot that you feel shows you the way you want to be seen. This one is nice, but be on the lookout for an opportunity to get one you a really happy with.

  2. That is one very nice headshot, Carole! Don’t make light of it! You look awesome, your smile is genuine, and you look very approachable! And I applaud you for ignoring Gladys so effectively! Well done!

  3. I like the head shot . . . but think you probably need to pay someone to get the one you want. (A photographer skilled in getting you to relax and “lean in” for a conversation. Also one who listens to what you’re hoping for in a photo.) I think the most important thing in battling imposter syndrome is to . . . believe in yourself even when you don’t – and then push on through, despite the “Gladys” in your head. (I call mine “Monica” by the way. . . ) You’re doing a great job, Carole. Keep pushing! XO

  4. Your head shot is nice, but I agree… an actual session (even :15) would produce a better result. I’m sure you already know, but photographers often have “head shot specials” and can be very reasonably priced.

    #3. That is TRUTH!!

  5. I can’t say that I’ve suffered from imposter syndrome, BUT I don’t do things like you do. I’m still an introvert so I don’t end up in situations where I feel like I’m out of my comfort zone. That’s both good and bad, but you are putting yourself out there, learning, and growing. Good for you!

  6. I’m with Kym on the head shot — I think it’s a great shot, but it would be worth it to get what you want.

    I agree that imposter syndrome is SO common. No great solutions, but i have found for myself, having a role, or seeing something as my job, makes it easier to be brave.

  7. Like everyone else, I think it’s a great headshot, but that really doesn’t count for much if it doesn’t convey what you want. I love that you named your imposter syndrome voice, and I hope you regularly tell Gladys to shut up already!

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