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Monday On My Mind

Dale and I have been talking for quite a while now about buying a camper. As a result, I regularly check Facebook Marketplace for used campers for sale and yesterday morning there was one listed that I thought was worth going to look at. I messaged the person who listed it and he gave me the address and his phone number and said it was parked behind his business and unlocked. I told him we’d drive over in the afternoon.

When we got there, the camper was actually locked. I messaged him and said, it’s locked . . . and he replied “sale pending”. Nothing else, just sale pending. I responded with, “it would have been nice if you had let me know so that I didn’t drive over when it wasn’t even available,” to which he said, “do you think I contact 100 people that are coming? says pending on the ad.” That was the end of our communication.

And really, it’s not a big deal. It was a Sunday afternoon and a drive while listening to the football game was not a bad way to spend it. In all likelihood the camper was probably smaller than we wanted, which was actually part of the reason why I wanted to look at it . . . to visualize just what 18ft of living space would be like. And the reality is that it was not in great shape from what we saw of the outside despite the fact that the inside photos he posted made it look practically new. In other words . . . we would not have purchased it.

But.

He was rude. And there was really no reason to be rude, was there? I wasn’t looking for more than an acknowledgement that he told me it would be available to look at and that changed without any contact from him. Maybe something along the lines of, “I’m sorry, someone got there before you and they want to buy it and I didn’t have the chance to let you know.” Is that too much to expect in this world we live in now?

I realize I sound like a cranky old lady, and maybe that’s where I’m headed, but I believe in courtesy, I believe in common decency, I believe in kindness. And I believe you ought to communicate with a potential buyer when something you are selling is no longer available.

It’s the polite thing to do.

This Post Has 14 Comments

  1. While my reaction would likely be like yours, sounds like maybe not the guy to do business with anyway. Or, he knew you were right and his wife had been nagging him to do that exact thing. : )

  2. It’s a sad state of affairs that a lot of people have chosen to give up courtesy and civility. It’s pretty maddening, depending on the situation. But you took the high road, and for that you should be pleased! I find it’s always better for my mental health to take the high road, but sometimes it’s hard! Hope you have a week full of kind people in it.

  3. If you’re a cranky old lady, then I am one, too. Being kind and considerate costs you nothing but can make such a huge difference, and I really think we’d all be in a much better place if people were kinder — certainly we’d be in a better place with regard to the pandemic if people thought of the well-being of others more often!

    I try to follow the advice of Mr. Rogers: “There are three ways to ultimate success: The first way is to be kind. The second way is to be kind. The third way is to be kind.”

  4. I agree with you, but my answer to your question “Is that too much to expect in this world we live in now?” is most likely yes. John buys old car parts on ebay all the time and we’re currently looking for a freezer on ebay marketplace. Rudeness has been a big part of the experience much of the time. I, too, believe in common courtesy, kindness, and communication, and when we are in charge things will be different!

  5. I learnt the hard way ‘do NOT sell too many things at once’ on fb mktplc or l’ll be confused. In other words l didn’t remember what date l had promised the woman she could come over and view the treadmill. I was out of state selling a family member’s items w a deadline. I always wrote, first come, first served when selling an item. I put up ‘sold’ immediately when done. This woman was very angry w me as she had lined up a friend or b-friend w a truck, tho she hadn’t made the trip. I apologized profusely. She then lambasted me in her reply and l deleted her.

  6. Ouch… just ouch. I am firmly in Bonny’s camp… that is just no longer the world we live in. Kindness is a dream from another lifetime and sadly, my favorite teachers phrase.. Kill them with kindness… well it just rolls off them like water.

    I hope that your Monday brings you moments of joy that make your Sunday trip a forgotten memory.

  7. I had something similar to this happen recently, but thankfully I didn’t make the drive over, I just asked her for her address so I could come see it and I know I was the first person to contact, but I never heard from her again until she messaged me the next day and told me it was sold…argggh

    Rudeness has been the one thing that really seems to have arisen from this pandemic. People have just lost their filters and the ability to be kind. It’s maddening and sad all at the same time.

    FYI….Ken and I are looking at campers too, but….I still want the boat more..haha!!

  8. Unfortunately civility seems to have gone out the window in the past 5 years. People used to just be nicer, didn’t they? I mean, there were always rude folks, to be sure … but there were more kind ones than rude. Or at least that’s what I remember. Now, in today’s world, rudeness seems to be the norm, and I don’t like it. Sign me up for the cranky old lady newsletter, please!

  9. My very limited experience on FB Marketplace has shown that buyers can also be quite rude. Playing devil’s advocate for a minute, and not knowing whether this actually happened, I wonder how many no-shows might have wasted his time? He had 100 people respond that they were coming? I know that I wouldn’t be messaging each and every one…

    Camper buying was cutthroat last year, and it sounds like it still is… because of that, even if it’s only a few hours between saying “I’m coming” and actually going, I’d check the ad and/or message again to verify availability.

  10. Unfortunately there is a lot of rudeness and impatience in the world right now. I guess some people forgot the old saying “treat people the way you would want to be treated.” So sad.

  11. I hope your future inquiries go more smoothly … and wishing all your trips to check out a potential purchase are filled with blue skies and football games! (also, how exciting to be looking for a camper!)

  12. I hope the rise in his pants is just a little bit snug . . . so he’s got that uncomfortable, pinchy feeling every time he moves. πŸ˜‰

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