Carole Knits

october zinnia
october zinnia
martinis with a view
martinis with a view
gettysburg fence for
gettysburg fence for
germinate shawl on rocks
germinate shawl on rocks
field of flags 2
field of flags 2
color affection with edge
color affection with edge
cedar leaf shawlette 2
cedar leaf shawlette 2
3_27_2014
3_27_2014
3_18_13
3_18_13
2_24_2014
2_24_2014
1_11_13
1_11_13
peony-bouquet-for-carole-knits
peony-bouquet-for-carole-knits
dale-and-jackie-for-carole-knits
dale-and-jackie-for-carole-knits
nightshift-progress-for-carole-knits
nightshift-progress-for-carole-knits
  • Home
  • Carole Julius Photography

Happy Birthday To My Mom

June 10, 2015 By Carole

Today, June 10th, would have been my mom’s 84th birthday. It’s strange to think of her as 84 since she was only 66 when she died. I mean, I work with people in their 80s all the time at the Council on Aging, so I know what women in their 80s are like, but picturing my mom at that age? Difficult. Then again, I was only 32 when she died and now I’m getting closer to 50 every day. And Hannah? She was 5.

barbara_hannah_carole_sept_1996 for carole knits

This picture is from Hannah’s 3rd birthday in September, 1995. So, 18 months before my mom died. She was fighting the cancer then and looking and feeling pretty good. Truly, she felt pretty good until about 3 months before she died and then – well, then she tried an experimental treatment at Dana Farber and it took a lot out of her and she just never really bounced back. She got weaker and  the fight was just gone. I think she sort of gave up at that point. The doctor had told her 3 years and it had been 3 years and I think she figured, well, I’ve fought long enough and I’m tired and I’m done. I certainly don’t blame her and I’m grateful for every day I had with her.

If she was here today she’d be coming over to celebrate her birthday with us. She’d be demanding and expecting my best effort and probably driving me nuts. I’d be stressed out about making sure her birthday was good enough, that the birthday dinner I’d cooked was up to her standards, that the present I’d picked was something she liked. Those of you with strong willed mothers and challenging relationships with them understand.

And still. I’d be thrilled to have her here. To have her give me a hard time. To have one more chance to please her and show her how much I loved her.

To take a picture of her at 84, me at 49 and Hannah at 22.

Happy Birthday, Mom. I miss you every day.

Related posts:

Default ThumbnailHappy 40th Birthday, Brant! Default ThumbnailHappy Birthday, Hannah! Default ThumbnailHappy Birthday, Hannah Default ThumbnailHappy Birthday, Jack!
« Ten On Tuesday
Summer Book Bingo Progress »

Filed Under: Birthdays

Comments

  1. Kym says

    June 10, 2015 at 8:15 am

    Oh, Carole. Sending XOXO today, especially.

  2. Bridget says

    June 10, 2015 at 8:21 am

    I truly understand this. My mom died when I was around the same age, and I also think of her and miss her every day. Happy Birthday to your mom – I will send a good thought to you all day today. 🙂

  3. Patty says

    June 10, 2015 at 8:51 am

    Happy Birthday to your Mom. And hugs to you today. Mine had some opinions as well and I miss her terribly.

  4. Judy says

    June 10, 2015 at 9:24 am

    Happy Birthday Carole’s mom. Sending hugs to you Carole.

  5. claudia says

    June 10, 2015 at 9:49 am

    That is a lovely picture. Hugs to you, my friend.

  6. margene says

    June 10, 2015 at 10:31 am

    You know I totally understand. Mom’s who die young stay young. You know she loves you still. xox

  7. Jo says

    June 10, 2015 at 11:52 am

    Margene is right about forever young. I totally appreciate your mixed, but still loving reaction to her.

  8. Kristyn says

    June 10, 2015 at 12:02 pm

    I completely understand. My mom passed away in 2002 when I was 26. Her birthday is coming up on the 29th and she would have been 73. I would love to hear her call me toots one more time – she called me that when she was frustrated with me!

  9. Manise says

    June 10, 2015 at 3:52 pm

    Beautiful photo. Hugs. <3

  10. Suzanne says

    June 10, 2015 at 6:18 pm

    Happy Birthday to your Mom! Hugs to you! Look at little Hannah, what a cutie.

  11. Mary says

    June 10, 2015 at 7:56 pm

    Oh Carole, hugs! I’m sure your mom is celebrating in grand style…living on in the memories of you and Hannah and everyone else who loved her. xo.

  12. Jo-Ann says

    June 10, 2015 at 9:42 pm

    Sure wish I’d had the privilege to know your mom, so I could tell her what an amazing daughter she’d raised. xoxox

  13. Beverly says

    June 11, 2015 at 7:25 am

    What a lovely tribute. I’ll be thinking of you today. Xxx

  14. Donna says

    June 11, 2015 at 11:36 am

    Hugs to you Carole <3

  15. Vicki says

    June 11, 2015 at 11:58 am

    XOXOX!!

Archives

carole AT caroleknits DOT net
my read shelf:
Carole's book recommendations, liked quotes, book clubs, book trivia, book lists (read shelf)

2020 Reading Challenge

2020 Reading Challenge
Carole has read 5 books toward her goal of 75 books.
hide
5 of 75 (6%)
view books

carolejuliusphoto

A rainy Saturday morning, the perfect excuse to dr A rainy Saturday morning, the perfect excuse to drink coffee and read in bed. #rainysaturday #cozyvibes #readinginbed #mudandyarn #christmasbedroom #ignoringmytodolist
Amaryllis Watch 2021 continues. Getting very close Amaryllis Watch 2021 continues. Getting very close now, I think. #amaryllis #amarylliswatch #waitingtobloom #amaryllisvelvetnymph
Amaryllis watch 2021 is on! #amarylliswatch #white Amaryllis watch 2021 is on! #amarylliswatch #whiteflowerfarm #amaryllisvelvetnymph #winterblooms
If there’s one thing the pandemic has been good If there’s one thing the pandemic has been good for, it’s my sourdough game. I actually started learning about making sourdough bread a week before the stay at home orders thanks to @sprboston as he shared his starter and recipe and technique with me. Since then I have kept Mama Cass fed and alive and have baked many loaves of bread. This one might be my best one yet. I did the final proof in the fridge for 24 hours and baked it from its cold state. Great spring and ear and crumb, it was delicious with dinner tonight. #sourdough #sourdoughbread #lookatthatcrumb #lookatthatear #homebakedbread #imadeitmyself #homemadeisbest
Nothing melts my librarian heart like taking my gr Nothing melts my librarian heart like taking my grandson to the library to pick out books. #nanahasakey #librarytime #readtoyourkids #attaboyjack #nanalife
Scenes from our dinner last night. There were only Scenes from our dinner last night. There were only 2 instead of our usual 8 and I missed my crew. Still, it was special to have my guy all to myself and we enjoyed an evening of good conversation, lots of music, and a few dances, too. GoodBYE 2020, Welcome  2021! #happynewyear #capresesticks #bakedstuffedshrimp #filetmignon #cocktailhourathome #dinnerathome #newyearsevedinner #thosenapkinsthough #imadeitmyself
My Instagram #topnine for 2020. Sure is a lot of D My Instagram #topnine for 2020. Sure is a lot of Dale. Good thing I love him! #topnine2020 #instagramtop9
When a very kind neighbor texts you and says, I ha When a very kind neighbor texts you and says, I have French onion soup and I’d like to share it ... you say YES! And when it turns out to be much more than soup but also crocks and bread and cheese and garnish ... you say, I sure am lucky to be part of this community. Thank you, Deb, from the bottom of our hearts. #homemadesoup #frenchonionsoup #kindneighbors #buildingcommunity
For the first time ever I have made ROUND Swedish For the first time ever I have made ROUND Swedish rye bread, ridges and all! That’s right, my local friends, no more stalking the Italian Kitchen for their bakery order to arrive, I can do it myself! Medwurst sandwiches forthcoming! #swedishryebread #limpabread #vörtlimpa #swedishchristmas #homemadeisbest #roundrye
God Jul! #godjul #happysolstice #welcomethelight # God Jul! #godjul #happysolstice #welcomethelight #glugg
Totally in love with our Christmas bedroom! #chris Totally in love with our Christmas bedroom! #christmasbedroom #christmasallthroughthehouse #christmaspillows #christmasbedding #letsstayhome #cozychristmas #letsstayinbed
Tonight at our house it’s sushi and Scrooge! #su Tonight at our house it’s sushi and Scrooge! #sushitime #tatamieastbridgewaterma #sushifordays #watchingchristmasmovies #achristmascarol #georgecscottisthebestscrooge #tistheseason
That’s a lot of trees! #christmascookies #spritz That’s a lot of trees! #christmascookies #spritzcookies #swedishchristmas #homemadeisbest #cookiebaking
I’ve had it for 33 years and it’s still one of I’ve had it for 33 years and it’s still one of my favorite ornaments on the tree. #wheatoncollege #christmasorbaments #wheatoncollegema #christmasbaubles
Of course I made lussekatter for St. Lucia Day. Di Of course I made lussekatter for St. Lucia Day. Did I post the photo I took, though? Nope! I forgot until today but here they are, a day late but definitely not a dollar short. #stluciaday #lussekatter #saffronbuns #swedishchristmas #swedishtraditions #christmasfood #lussekatt #homemadeisbest #julbak #godjul
I may be a shiksa but I can still make good potato I may be a shiksa but I can still make good potato latkes! Happy Hanukkah, my friends! #potatolatkes #happyhannukah
Happy December Friday, friends! #fridaynigntsnacks Happy December Friday, friends! #fridaynigntsnacks #martinitime #cheeseandcrackers #choppedliver #thosenapkinsthough
The tree is up in a new location, I think Captain The tree is up in a new location, I think Captain Julius will keep a good eye over it. #christmastree2020 #ohchristmastree
The first Friday Night Snacks in December most def The first Friday Night Snacks in December most definitely call for Swedish meatballs! #fridaynightsnacks #swedishmeatballs #martinitime #thosenapkinsthough #cocktailsathome #quarantinelifebelike
It’s December first, time to open the advent cal It’s December first, time to open the advent calendar of wine! #wineadventcalendar #itsthemostwonderfultimeoftheyear #hellodecember #winetime #cutestadventcalendarever #drinkwineeveryday
Load More... Follow on Instagram

Subscribe to Blog via Email

Enter your email address to subscribe to this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email.

Categories

ABC Along Adventures of Dale and Carole Birthdays Bloggers Books Charity Knitting Contests Eye Candy Friday Feeling Crafty Fiber Festivals Food Good, Bad, Ugly Hmmm Knitting Knitting Olympics Macro Monday Memes Monday On My Mind Movies One Little Word Photography Project Spectrum Quilting Random Read With Us Reenacting Run For Your Life Saturday Posts Selfies Show & Tell Sock Knitting Spinning Sunday Funnies Swaps Ten on Tuesday Thankfulness That's Life Think Write Thursday Three Things Throwback Thursday Thursday Things Uncategorized Vacations Wordless Words in the Wild

Copyright 2014 Carole Knits · Log in