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How The Days Get Away From Me

June 2, 2020 By Carole

I had every intention of writing a blog post for today at some point yesterday.

But then, I slept a little late.

And Dale’s Physical Therapist came at 9.

By the time she left and we had eaten breakfast and I had cleaned up and did some work stuff it was after 12.

I got Dale settled on the couch with strict orders not to move so that I could make a quick run to the nursery to get plants for the window boxes. Dale wanted to hang out in the yard when I got back so I helped him outside. By the time I finished with the planting (Jackie came to help, it was adorable) and had cleaned up it was 2 and we had a conference call with our lawyer. And then it was nearly 3 and we hadn’t had lunch. So I reheated some pizza, cleaned up the kitchen again, had a visit from a neighbor who brought a lovely coffee cake, changed the sheets on our bed, and got ready for a Board of Selectmen’s Meeting on Go To Meeting.

After that I answered a few more work emails, and then we headed outside for cocktails on the deck. I watered all the plants. Our neighbor came over to borrow some vinegar because her two year old had drawn on their furniture. We caught up and chatted, and I started the grill to cook some brats to go with the potato salad I had (thankfully) made on Sunday afternoon. We ate inside, I cleaned up (again), watched a little TV (including the final episode of Schitt’s Creek which was terrific and emotional) and headed for bed.

My days are full! Dale is gaining independence and able to do much more for himself but he still needs help, particularly with getting in and out of the house, taking his boot on and off, remembering his meds (including the daily shot in the belly to prevent blood clots), and the proper placement of pillows for propping his leg. Plus fetching things like books and drinks and treats for him so that he can rest. And everything seems to take longer because I’m doing it by myself, from setting the table to cleaning up after meals, keeping the house picked up, and taking care of outside stuff.

And that’s why, sometimes, I don’t have time to write a proper blog post.

The end.

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Comments

  1. Robby says

    June 2, 2020 at 7:08 am

    Life is extra complicated now without the need to help Dale. We all understand. Can his med schedule or at least his injection be put on his or your phone like daily appointments? Then you can have it alert you when it’s time. Automating that is less to hold in your brain which doesn’t mean less to do, but might help the worry of so many things to remember. It helped at our house when we went through a spell like this. Hang in there, you’ll get through this.

  2. Kat says

    June 2, 2020 at 7:46 am

    While I don’t have an injured spouse, the days do have an insane quality to them. Some days I wonder what the hell I did all day and others I am exhausted and then have to think about what the hell to make for dinner!

    I am so glad Dale is improving!! And I am glad you are home to help him right now.

  3. Liza says

    June 2, 2020 at 8:02 am

    Sounds like a full day to me. One foot in front of the other, especially in Dale’s case. I have been making coffee cakes as well, seems like a thing to do. Love seeing the flowers.

  4. Sarah says

    June 2, 2020 at 8:09 am

    Sounds to me like you’re taking care of life and the important things. Getting to read a blog post from you is always a treat, but I’d much rather you’d spend that time taking care of yourself and Dale when you need to!

  5. Bonny says

    June 2, 2020 at 8:18 am

    If you could clean up the kitchen just once/day, maybe you could save time that way? Surely the maid can do that! (I seriously wish I had one to send to you for help.) A possible time saver: when I had my PE, I was getting the shot in the belly (Lovenox), and they wanted to discharge me with that. I asked (begged) if there was an alternative, mainly because John faints at the sight of needles and I didn’t picture myself doing it long term. My helpful patient coordinator made calls to the dr and ins. co., and they discharged me on Eliquis. I take a 5 mg pill 2x/day and no shots. Maybe that’s a possibility for Dale.
    Breathe and take care (of Dale and yourself).

  6. Kym says

    June 2, 2020 at 8:43 am

    Hang in there. Dale is healing well, and soon he’ll be even more independent and – knowing Dale – will be eager to share the load again. Sending all my love and good healing juju. XOXO

  7. Mary K. in Rockport says

    June 2, 2020 at 9:21 am

    Yeah, it’s tough being the nursing home manager, the house manager, the chief cook and bottle washer, a town committee member, a head librarian, and a loving wife, all at the same time. I know – my husband has had four (4!!!!) hip replacements with long recoveries afterward. It was hard, my sympathies. Dale will get better and better every day, and your world will be right again.

  8. Patty says

    June 2, 2020 at 9:40 am

    It’s like I can see you zoom-zooming around! Yay for the Jackie treat though and yes, before you know it you’ll be back to “normal”.

  9. Vicki says

    June 2, 2020 at 9:42 am

    This reminds me of what it was like being a SAHM with three little kids — except you don’t have the arguing!! Haha. Hang in there, Carole! I’m so glad Dale is improving, and hopefully it won’t belong before all is right in the world again (whatever that means these days). xo

  10. Vera says

    June 2, 2020 at 11:36 am

    Life is so busy just regularly and then something happens to make it even more so! The most important things are: 1) Dale is healing nicely and 2) you are home and able to care for him. Hang in there and take deep breaths! Things will improve over time (but the waiting for that to happen can be agonizing I know!!).

  11. kmkat says

    June 2, 2020 at 2:12 pm

    Back in 2012 Smokey had back surgery that morphed into a 3-month recovery for various reasons. I feel your burden. Anything you can do to remove stuff from your mental load is good. And physical therapy can be a life-saver. I was in a wheel chair for nearly 3 months in 2008 when I broke my ankle; when I was able to walk again, my back had lost a lot of strength. Still working on that. Hang in there!

  12. Suzanne says

    June 2, 2020 at 6:17 pm

    I’m glad Dale is doing better. I am sure Jackie was a bright spot during the day. I’m sure life is busy right night but I hope things fall into place and get a little easier every day.

  13. Julia in KW says

    June 2, 2020 at 6:34 pm

    There are times in your life when control is not in your grasp and this seems to be true for you right now…so find the one or two things that are in your control, do those and everything else is icing on the cake if it gets done…obviously do the things that will make you twitch if they are not done, but otherwise, let it go! The time will come to get to the other things…and look after the people who are most important … yourself and Dale!

  14. Katie @ The Cozy Burrow says

    June 3, 2020 at 5:46 am

    Oh my goodness. In some ways it must feel like having young children again – there’s so much to do all of the time!! I’m glad to hear that Dale is regaining independence. What a relief for both of you!

    Sometimes you just gotta take things one second at a time!

  15. Christine Quaglia says

    June 3, 2020 at 6:04 pm

    Carole, you machine, you do not owe anybody an explantation! But it is so nice to know how you spend your day. Your blog posts got me through so much along this ongoing pandemic and you somehow managed to put in words exactly how I feel. I still have some issues with tears for no apparent reason, but I am finally venturing out into the world (after so many attempts to do so sanely) and facing life again. I feel like I don’t know how to grocery shop anymore, I go down the wrong aisle, I reach in close to someone else to grab a bottle of ketchup. But things are looking up! I am back at Peaceful Meadows, and maybe one of these nights soon I will stop by (masked of course) with some frozen pudding! Love to you guys!

  16. Mary says

    June 3, 2020 at 6:35 pm

    oh my goodness, you! you’re doing great, and I’m glad you have your priorities in order 🙂

    • Mary says

      June 3, 2020 at 6:35 pm

      p.s. and your kitchen sounds incredibly tidy!

  17. LYDIA SHEFFIELD says

    June 5, 2020 at 11:23 am

    I know being able to go outside and move around a bit more make a huge deal in the healing process.

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