I didn't mean to be AWOL yesterday, it was just one of those things, you…
Roots Are Easy, Wings Are Hard
Saturday night before dinner
And so, just like that, the big move is done. Hannah is now a college freshman. I am happy and excited for her and hope that she has a wonderful college experience.
As for me, I’m feeling a bit bereft. Like a left this big part of me over there on the other side of Massachusetts – which I sort of did. I’m going to have to learn how to function without this bit of myself and I sure hope it doesn’t take too long because I’m not enjoying this feeling.
Sunday afternoon in her dorm room
I have many friends in this boat with me right now and that helps a whole lot. And I know I have all of you, my dear readers. Many of you have emailed and commented to tell me that you are thinking about me and that helps bunches, it really does.
So, if I may ask, please, continue to think good thoughts for me and for my baby girl.
And especially think good thoughts for Dale – he’s the one who has to deal with all this emotional mother/daughter crap. The poor guy.
This Post Has 35 Comments
Comments are closed.
Sending good thoughts – I hope it get easier for you. I hope it gets better for me also….still having a bit of a hard time here. But I keep thinking that this is what we worked so hard for the last eighteen years. I just can’t wait until Columbus Day when I get to see him again!
Well put on the heading of your post – trust in the foundation you have given Hannah and all will be well. I hope each day gets a little easier and just think Parents Day and Thanksgiving aren’t that far off. BTW, she looks so happy on her dorm bed.
My heart goes out to you because I know it’s not easy … but you did a GREAT job raising Hannah, so I know she’s going to be just fine … and your momma did a GREAT job raising you, so I know you will be as well. Especially with a little help from all your friends 🙂 Take comfort in the fact that western Mass is alot closer than some places she could have gone … and far enough away that she won’t keep making the home-sickness worse by coming home too often!
If I’m having a hard time watching my little boy grow up into a 4 year old, I can’t imagine how hard it must be to see Hannah go off to college! My heart goes out to you! But she will always be a part of you, no matter how far away she is. Its like best friends, but stronger-time and space make no difference, right?
She’s going to be fine. She’s going to be fine. Keep repeating.
You did a good job and she’s going to do great at college. And, you and Dale will have the house all to yourselves. Yup. 🙂
I’ll be thinking of you and Hannah, it does get easier but I still get some days when the house is sooo quiet and I just want to hear my boys running and fighting upstairs, instead my elder son is waiting for his Master’s Dissertation results and my younger one is waiting for a resit exam result and hopefully starting his last year at Uni, guess I’m trying to say they still need us but in different ways.
Oh, Carole … I’m sure she’ll do fine — and you will, too — but of course it’s a big adjustment. Keeping you both in my thoughts …
I’m glad that Hannah got settled in well. She does look very excited and very happy. I will continue to pray for you all. Several of my friends here are going through the same thing and this all makes me a bit teary eyed. I can’t explain that except that maybe it’s because I know it’s coming for me in a couple of years.
In 2 weeks I’ll be in the same place you are, and I was wondering how you are doing this morning as I woke up. I keep telling myself that it’s good developmentally for them to be going away. Going off to college was thrilling for me and I hope it will be for them. Look at how happy Hannah is! In my case, I’d rather have my daughter ensconced in Providence then running around NYC at all hours. And now there’s Skype, right? On a much more mundane note, I’ve also been wondering where my daughter will put all her toiletries, and now I know.
Damn. You are making me cry. (That probably doesn’t help much but there it is!) Thinking of you three.
Good thoughts are going your way on this Monday morning. Hannah looks quite happy on her purple bed. Is Dale suffering, as well, from the separation? P.S. There may be some desperate phone calls in the first few days, but don’t worry – she’ll figure things out.
I’m with you, Carol. Do they have a Parent’s weekend at Hannah’s college? If so, just focus on that trip back to see her. It might help.
Tomorrow is my DD’s freshman move in day. I’m excited for her. I’m trying to keep focused on what she needs next in her life which is a college education. Isn’t that what us mothers do? – give our kids what they need? But I know I’ll miss her. I’m not sure I’m prepared for the missing her part. It helps (in a way ) that I don’t think she will be homesick. Her college is 90 miles away from us…. she could come home on an occasional weekend if she wants to. Letting go is hard.
I’ve got 9 days to go! I feel for you, and like you have a lot of friends in the same boat. It doesn’t make it easier when that house is pretty quiet though! Sending a hug.
Many (((((((Hugs))))))) to all three of you!
Sending thoughts of courage and comfort to ALL of you. Hannah looks radiant – you’ve raised her well and given her wings to fly high.
The exciting thing to see over the next several years, is where those wings take her. I am so amazed and so proud of the paths my two stepdaughters (now 25 and 29) have taken and the brave, confident women they have become – and it all started with move-in day.
Bereft is a good word to explain the feeling..
Hannah does look so happy though and she will do well…you raised her up well. 🙂
She looks happy — keep that picture in your mind!! Thinking of you all, of course, and sending my best.
While I’ll never go through the of emotional experience, I feel I can understand what you’re both feeling. My eyes fill with tears of joy for you and Hannah. You’ll feel a sea for awhile, but my guess is she’ll be texting you often! Love to you both.
She looks so happy! I guess you do have to let them grow up, hard as it may be! Hang in there! :o)
I will be thinking of you. When my older son went off to college, I thought it would be so easy for me because he is my “challenge child”. Hah! I sobbed the night before we went and the night that we dropped him off. But it did get better, knowing that I had done my job. The same thing happened with my younger son, although I knew that it would because he and I are so alike and very close. And that got better too. With him it was even faster, because I knew so well that he was ready. The most important thing that I learned was to text and IM with him. It kept us in touch and he told me things that I think he might not have if he’d had to hear my voice (girlfriend woes, etc). He is starting graduate school tomorrow (living at home) but he still IM’s when he sees me online just to say hi. I feel very fortunate about that. Hannah looks so happy in that photo, and you will both eventually be fine, but know that there are people sending you a hug in the meantime.
Thinking of you both, and wishing you all the best.
Hang in there! I’m going to need you to hold me up when I do this in a few years!
xoxo
My thoughts are with you as you and Hannah make your way through this transition. Leaving both my daughters at college was a wrenching experience for me, but even though there were one or two tearful phone calls we all ended in a happy place. With my older daughter, I can remember crying from the time we left campus until we stopped to eat. 15 miles away. I was a mess walking into the fast food restaurant. Upon arriving home, my composed husband shut the door to my daughter’s room. He couldn’t bear to see it devoid of her presence. We opened it a few days later. I remember writing a journal entry following my younger daughter’s move that I still read with a smile at now that they are many years out of college.
I dropped my daughter off at UMass Lowell on Saturday. She is my first to leave. The tears for us came in April when a decision about school needed to be made and her first choice was way too much for the family budget to handle – unless she wanted a monthly loan payment the size of a mortgage once she graduated. Kate has always been the independent one who has been going to sleepover camp happily since the end of second grade. Her dad and I got her things to her room on Saturday, adjusted and made her bed with her, then asked if there was anything else she needed for us to do. Her response was “no, I have to live here so I will put my things away.” She is having problems with her roommate’s mom who didn’t leave school until Saturday night some time after 9 and returned on Sunday at noon. My daughter called yesterday and she is doing fine and has been doing things and going places with kids she met in orientation. She is not letting the roommate and her mom get her down.
I am sure that Hannah will be fine and you will too with time.
My dod told me that when I moved out, my mom cried herself to sleep each night for several nights following. At the time, my twenty year old self thought that was sad, but really not necessary. Now I get it. I hope you sleep well knowing you’ve raised a beautiful, intelligent, independent woman – who will still need her mommy for many years to come. She’s only far away in miles. xoxo
Wow – all these comments have me so emotional! I was thinking of you this weekend Carole. Hannah looks so happy and excited. It will probably take a little while for all of you to adjust to your new place in life. And she is not that far away if you need a mommy-daughter fix!
I’ll continue to send good thoughts your way.
Hugs! At least in this electronic age you can tweet or message her and be in touch w/out being in the way, right?
cyber hugs to all of you –
Having wonderful children makes the world a better place.. but it sure is hard to say goodbye to them.
Hannah looks fantastic as she launches into the next stage of her world.
Life is a moving target, and I know you will move with it gracefully. Your girls (us) are with you.
It means you have a good relationship, let yourself feel those feelings. Life is good.
Wings ARE hard! I have a Hannah as well, one year older. She hasn’t gone away to college yet, but that day is coming. I feel for you, I know it’s hard. Hang in there, it will get better and take comfort in what an accomplished young woman you have for a daughter.
I’m thinking of you and hoping that you’re doing ok. I think that missing Hannah says a lot about your relationship. It’s wonderful to watch our girls grow into fully formed people that we’re proud of. I’m very happy that I have a few years before I have to let go.
Am thinking of you and wishing that you are doing better. It is hard when they go off to college or move away. Somehow we manage to survive – but, there will be days when the thought of them being far will tear you apart. We just need to remember that we reared beautiful daughters who are strong young women! I’m here if you need to vent!!!
My husband and I had to deliver our 18 year old to college in Vancouver this weekend – from Minnesota! It feels like he is much too far away!