The Read With Us Lounge: Banning the Shoulds

One of the things that comes with being an adult is the shoulds. The shoulds aren’t bad, necessarily. They help us prioritize things we need to do . . .

I should empty the dishwasher before I sit down to read.

I should go to bed at a decent hour and not read another chapter of this very compelling book.

I should go to that party instead of staying home alone with my book.

But somewhere along the way, the shoulds started creeping into our reading enjoyment, too . . .

I should read all the books in this series because I started it.

I should read the classics instead of trashy romance novels.

I should read this book that my friend recommended and loved even though it doesn’t appeal to me.

I should finish this book because I’m already halfway through.

I should read faster.

I should read more.

The Read With Us Lounge is about ignoring the shoulds. The little voice that says to put productivity over pleasure. The judgmental voice that says the books you read aren’t good quality. The competitive voice that turns reading into a race or a checklist.

There are no shoulds in the lounge.

There is only reading for the sheer joy of reading. Reading what you want, when you want, at whatever pace feels right. Reading because a book caught your eye, because a story sounds interesting, because spending an afternoon with a novel is sometimes reason enough.

That’s it. That’s the assignment. Enjoy your time in the lounge this week.

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Comments (13)

  1. Oh, yes. So many shoulds! I hope we can all free ourselves of the “shoulds” here in the Lounge this summer. XO

  2. Excellent reminder! I have been doing a lot of “should reading” recently and last night I picked up a mystery novel and a few pages in I was hooked and realized how I have missed being caught up in a good mystery novel!

  3. I think one characteristic that marks a real reader is reading what they want and what they enjoy and not listening to all those shoulds! It’s not about how many books you read or whether you’ve read the latest it book — it’s about reading the best books for you.

  4. The only time the shoulds has been part of my reading life was school. I should put this book down and… do my homework, go to bed, etc. Reading was fully modeled in my home as a child and there were no limits imposed outside those things. If I chose a book beyond my reading level, I was pointed to the dictionary first with an option to discuss after. When I was on a small budget, I did finish a few books because I paid for them… until I discovered a used bookstore where I could turn them into better books. Very limited reading time convinced me it was time to return to reading what I want for fun. If I’m interested in something substantial that’s great, if I need to escape that’s great too. Finishing a series because I started it? That’s like keeping icky people for friends because you met them. We can outgrow friends and books. I’m psyched about this periodic reminder to get off my screens and return to my friends on the shelf.

  5. Thank you! And, I so agree. One of the joys of being my age is I have the time to read all day if I choose. Having a pile of books (that I want to read), a cozy seat, and I good lamp gives me all I need to enjoy the day. (Oh, and a cuppa tea, too.)
    I’m there with you all the way!

  6. Yay for no rules and no shoulds!! I love getting recommendations from friends (like all of you), but I don’t check the lists of what has won a prize, etc.

  7. This is such a great idea, Carole. I am glad you guys came up with it! I have mainly given up most of the “shoulds” in my life, as _should_ be the case at my age. HA! However, I am sure there are still some lurking back there so quietly that I don’t realize they are still there. The reading lounge may help me ferret them out and banish them. Because reading is supposed to be fun, intriguing, and never a waste of time!

  8. I was so thrilled to be done with school and be able to read whatever I want. That diminished a bit and I started to think that I should read literary fiction. But so far this summer I’m reading just what I want to and loving it!

  9. One of the reasons I love retirement is that I can spend all day reading if I want to! There are no “shoulds” as far as what I read. I enjoy a variety of genres depending on my mood. Reading has always been a joy for me!

  10. I tried several times to read books recommended by friends, but without success. (Journals of Emma K. Lion I’m looking at you.) Hopefully we can all learn to be free of shoulds and read what we want, when we want!

    1. I have no idea why I commented twice, other than I was sure that I hadn’t commented this morning. Sorry!

  11. I should read what I own and I kinda am except for any library books. I made a list of possible books that I would like to read this summer and I’m working on that and it helps as it reminds me of what I want to read. I am also adding any library books I may find (or if I put them on hold, come in) and that should work for me. I was at the library today at the town I usually go to as they are now in a different library system (my town left that one and joined another) so now they put me in their system and I can continue to use the app that use and put books on hold. It’s just more convenient for me and I’m glad I was able to get that set up today.

  12. Just saw this and LOVE it. (As I go back to Theo of Golden…as I should finish it. Audio so I will do it and maybe find it better than first take???)

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